...and I sit here (icing my right calf and back, no less) knowing that I have not trained as I had planned to. Despite my commitment to my training plan, an injury sidelined me six weeks before race day. I'm upset. I'm upset that I didn't get all my miles in. Upset that just as I was approaching that crucial time of training where I started to push myself to uncomfortable levels, I had to stop. Upset that I didn't benefit from all those weeks of not only physically readying myself, but (possibly more importantly) mentally preparing myself.
As I reviewed the course map yesterday, I noted that all participants (marathoners, half marathoners and 10kers) all start at the same start line and all end at the same finish line. As a matter of fact, all participants run the 10k course first. The 10kers end there at the finish line, while the half and full marathoners continue on. The thought of passing the finish line after running (only) 6.2 miles, seemed annoying to me. What if my mental game is way off and I want to give up? Will I want to quit if it seems like an easy out? I suddenly thought, "I could contact the director of the marathon and ask if I could drop back to the 10k? Hmm, I would still get a nice recycled handmade glass medal, just not as big." And just as quickly as I thought that, I remembered something that I dog-eared in a book over a year ago.
From Complete Book of Women's Running by Dagny Scott Barrios:
"Not meeting a goal is not failure. In fact, if success were a certainty, you wouldn't have much of a challenge to begin with. There is little point in setting an easily attainable goal. Goals are meant to stimulate you and inspire greatness. A goal that is obviously attainable is without value. That means that any worthy goal comes with the implication that you might not meet it. Learning and growth come only in the struggle to attain your goal."
You see I ran 6.2 miles last week. I know that I can finish the 10k. And although, finishing a half marathon in 2 hours and 30 minutes (or maybe even 3 hours) may not seem like the "greatness" mentioned above, it would be MY greatness! So, although the 10k is obviously attainable for me, on Sunday, I strive to succeed in something that I am uncertain of.
I race to become a half marathoner!